Thursday 1 March 2007

Fank '07

Calumannabel made a timely reminder that it is indeed that time of the year again. Time for friskyness at the South Dell fank!

The arrangements are already beginning as I type. A one-way system will be in operation across the island, with only clockwise movement allowed on the roads. That is to say, from Stornoway to Barvas up to South Dell; those leaving the fank will have to continue round to Skigersta and make their way south across the moor to Tolsta. I thought the council had allocated £80 million for those 10 miles of road years ago, so there should be a road by now. Or did I hear someone say BCCI?

Public transport arrangements are also being trialled, in the shape of the minirail system that is envisaged for the Castle Grounds. Tracks will be laid over the Barvas Moor over a distance of about 20 miles to Dell, and the carriages will be fully wind- and waterproof. I don't know about windproof, but perhaps Somerfields and the Coop could stop selling baked beans in the last week of this month.


In order to get female participants across the Minch, a cruiseliner has been chartered - the one that called here on a Sunday last May. The chaps will have to row it across the Minch in a hollowed log, although a refreshment stop will be provided on Eilean Tighe, on the Shiants, before the last leg into Stornoway. Men arriving by any other means but a carved-out log will not be allowed to proceed to the Fank.

Further updates from Calumannabel.

1 comment:

  1. "The first photo is a still from the programme 'Ewe'ver been framed' Arnish you're a genius - suddenly every trainspotter in Britain will want to come to the Fank - imagine the bright scene with all those anoracks and tartan Thermos flasks - What a magnet for the women eh? It is a well known scientific fact that single women are attracted to displays of colour - eg Sunny has an art shop QED"

    calumannabel from The Fank Bunker
    "BCCI? I think I have one of their biros and certainly some of their cheap razors"

    bonald from back
    "The Tolsta-Ness road will never, ever, happen whatever the Council and the locals want. Good old RSPB will stop any and every development in the moorland to protect the birdies. How long before locals become the rarest species on the island?"

    Hooper Swan from The Moor
    "Will the RSPB be twitching, or is it bird flu?"

    Tws from The Croft Lewis
    "Calum sounds chuffed.... Those sheep really look up for it, and not an old boiler among them...as long as none of the chaps are piston the job or go off the rails, it'll be a world class Fank."

    Flying Cat from the coal bunker
    "Maybe the service providers of the train could extend the service for those who are unable to make the journey to the fank to see callum and annabels sheep.If it was passing anyway,it could have a few a "m h e e" ndmends made to the train and have a stock carraige added ,to take the renowned sheep back to the castle grounds for all to see,at no cost to calum for the journey "single or return" that would not be fare,and prove positive we had a new and caring train service,a novelty in its self, but a system that would also prove the train ops are not railroading people into having to make this expedition purely for the sake of cash,that indeed calums sheep are worthy of the write up above,and they are not pulling the wool over our eyes,and I said write up,not wind up,thats the train,.I apologise in advance for not being sure of my gaelic spelling for "bleating" I feel a bit sheepish.Windfarms,a tunnel,trains,and the hole in the wall,"what next"."

    The New Point Bard from Point,.

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